I Need Some Answers
I Need Some Answersby brianlion
Why do they design beer cans for men to open?
Shouldn't beer cans be designed for woman?
Women are supposed to open the cans,
Then hand them to their man.
Why is a bra spelled singular,
And panties are spelled plueral.
Shouldn't it be the other way around?
Think about it.
A diamond is said to be a girl's best friend.
A dog is said to be a man's best friend.
I would like a recount.What were our other choices?
Steak? Football? Sex? TV? How'd we get stuck with dog?
I saw an ad for the upcoming schizophrenic convention
I can't get anyone to go with me.
Anybody who is everybody will be there.
Think of it as a early halloween costume party with no costume.
I saw a TV commericial where the woman says
"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful".
Shouldn't she have said, Don't hate because I'm beautiful
Hate me because I have no talent and I'm making millions."
I was listening to a TV preacher.
He was preaching about the love of money.
He said it was the root of all evil.
He said-- for more information, send him $25.
I watched my wife putting on her make up.
Why can't women put on make up with their mouths closed?
All women reading this, put on your mascara.
See, you keep opening your mouth.
Most people think time travel is impossible.
Actually it is real and happens every day.
I am a time traveler right now.
Traveling at 60 minutes an hour.
Why is it when peole make mistakes in the morning,
They say, I just need my coffee.
Doesn't that mean they'll still make mistakes
Faster and with more energy?
Have you noticed at work holiday parties
There are 2 kinds of people?
Friendly and want to stay, vs boring and want to go home early?
Unfortunately, they are usually married to each other.
I saw my ex girlfriend today.
I remember what she said when we were together.
She said she loved me so much, she would die for me.
I think I'm going to make her keep that promise.
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