Morbid
The silent rain echoes loudly in my earsNow it feels like I've been in pain for years.
No, place to hide, nowhere to go
Can I go on, I want to know.
It's harder today than it was yesterday
It's going to get harder with each passing day.
I know in my heart this is teh best thing
Out of pain, I begin to sing.
I sing of darkness, and death, the morbid circle,
Now I feel it, the blood, it tickles.
I didn't even know I had the blade in my hand,
I see it here, but I thought it was sand.
I had gone to a place inside my mind,
A place where I often go when I hide.
A beautiful sandy beach at sunset,
Where I sit on the shore wrapped in a wollen blanket.
I watch the sun fade, symbolic of my pain,
This time it didn't fade, it didn't go away.
Instead I played with the stade, a castle I made,
Instead of picking up sand, I picked up my blade.
Now I'm aware of what I am doing,
JI'm terrified now, and the blade, it is moving
I don't seem to be doing this alone.
Like an outside force is sending me home.
Dripping my blood all over the floor,
I walk over and pick up the rope.
In a morbid moment, I think morbid thoughts.
Somehow I managed to tie up the knot.
I whish I would do it, just fall to my death,
But I'm not ready to die, not just yet.
I don't want to die, I want to live
I wish to love, my soul to give.
Alas, I wish you could see the turmoil inside,
But in a corner, bleeding, I hide.
I'm screaming and crying, I wish you could see,
Just how much pain you have caused me.
I was a small innocent child, not even grown,
You took away my life, took away my home.
You robbed me of innocence, now I bleed again,
Everytime I feel that touch of your hand.
I don't know your face, not even your voice,
Yet my nightmares you haunt, I've got no choice.
I wish to be rid of the pain you have caused,
I wish you could see underneath all this gauze.
You raped my spirit, killed my soul, brought me shame,
The hurt you once brought me I live with today.
I hate you completely, though I remember you not,
I wish you are dead, decomposed and rot.
I feel so alone, helpless, ashamed,
I feel like a pawn in your sick little game.
With all this hurt, confusion, pain,
This is why I bring out the blade.
Let go of this hurt I harbor inside,
Do this so I don't have to die.
These morbid thoughts in this morbid hour,
Go wash the blood off in the shower.
Cry away the pain, anger, and shame,
Be thankful I don't even know his name.
I'm going to bleed, I'm going to hurt,
I'm going to cover this all with my shirt.
These morbid actions are all I have,
To keep me from going morbidly mad.
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