Messed Up

the one thing i have control over, or is it taking over me? crowded by a black tunnel slowly caving in on my body and mind..crushing any hope or desire for life to ever fufill my need.my blade rubs my skin as blood starts to rush and poor out in a stream slowly slipping into a puddle. But the pain reminds me i am still alive, and still incontrol.. But i think it is slowly taking over me, gripping my need for it, and taking away the pain i had.i reach for it, but i cant quit grasp it, it is like a dream...i want it but cant quit reach it... the blood streams down as i feel it drop from my wrist i relize what i have just done, i panick. i want to scream..but it goes back for more...desiring it one more time. Who would have guessed this would have been my last chance to experience the savoring taste of what has to come. and what will come no more, gone like the wind, like my soul..killing what i had and once did hold.