Never Smile Again

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  • Emotional

    Never Smile Again

     we take our time getting to know just who we are
    we recite emotion like penny words- that mean nothing
    fuck that i can wear a mask for you
    ill always be a drug addict- even if i dont use anymore
    because if these chaines werent holding me- id be in newark, plainfield, spanish harlem or on a dead end street with an angel
    why wont you just let me dissapear for you
    you can see that pain inside me- i know it- i try so hard to pretend that i am happy n that im ok
    but i get a step further away everyday- my mom- my dad-
    they showed me how easy it is to die everyday
    - its not hard to fall-life has has taught me to cry
    ive been the remorse of to many early heartbreaking goodbyes
    " what do u do when u feel like its over?
    i want to get high on heroin and jack
    alone in a hotel room
    maybe ill shoot some of it up
    the needle n the damage done
    spend enough- to kill me-
    i dont smile anymore- until the heroin kicks in
    " i dont know if anyone understands how it feels to hate yourself so much
    this is not depression- i want to know what i did that made me feel so wrong
    i dont think i can ever smile again- i guess happiness got away with murder!
     

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    jferclark commented on Never Smile Again

    08-05-2009

    From one junkie to another I feel your pain sister. Keep writing, get that shit out there. You are beautiful... you are worthy... you are not alone!
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    When power leads man towards arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the area of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.

    John F. Kennedy (1917-1963) Thirty-fifth President of the USA

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