Simply Thoughts of You

9 Comments

Poem Commentary

This poem was inspired by a talented Poet, Jes, and her poem 'Time has Come'. and it is loosely based on a on conversation the two of us had. I give her writing credit as she gave me permission to use some of her responses in our private conversation in this poem. She also provided the heart and inspiration for this work so I hope it shows.

Spence

Simply Thoughts of You

“Tell me it is rubbish, give me your true thoughts”
My flesh breaks loose in goose bumps,
For it is my wisdom she has sought"

Avidly, her poems I read,
My perception was, Angelic!
She gets into my head,
And makes my mind go psychedelic

Gathering my thoughts, I opine,

“Then rubbish it is I proclaim,
If that is what you desire”
“But in reality, your words warm my soul,
And lift my spirits higher”

“I long to be the man you met,
Who stole your breathe with his words”
“In my dreams, this wish will be,
No need to be discouraged”

“I will be there to guard your door,
Dreaming is absence of pain”
“Turn your head up to feel my essence,
Should you find yourself lost in the rain”

“I’ll be the boy with curious eyes,
And shades of amber hair”
“Visiting you in your slumber,
Promise me you’ll be there”

Promise me she did, I still recall her response

“Dreams I live inside this box
Shake me, Open me, Do my eyes not Flutter?
Slumber, meet me there
Let me not wake”

Her words rang so true,
As if they were written in Dylan’s soul
Her beauty only matched,
By the elegance her words behold

Excitedly I proclaim:

“Then tonight it is, in our dreams we meet”
“Where the wandering streams flow beneath our feet,
Clouds no longer out of reach,
Our clothes slosh around on some sandy beach,
Innocent and free, reminiscent of our youth
We soar to heights which alone cannot reached
What once was false has shifted to truth,
Impossible turns conceivable when I’m with you,
I await your presence, under the celestial sky so blue”

Until then, simply thoughts of you

Poem Comments

(9)

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laydbak1 commented on Simply Thoughts of You

07-24-2009

I enjoyed this glaring proclamation of wanting, desiring, and caring for someone so much, you could have easily done this in oratory off the top of a mountain that it echo the strength of it's purpose in wave after wave.... great write Spence

lois2lane245 commented on Simply Thoughts of You

06-12-2009

out standingly beautiful i needed to breath a deep breath after that one it did take me to new hights

am2anangel commented on Simply Thoughts of You

06-09-2009

Wow! to be loved and be almost able to feel the passion in this piece. I assumed it's for Jes. She's one lucky girl. Your comments back and forth to each other are also very moving. A passion that is all to often too rare in this day and time. Nice job

Paolo commented on Simply Thoughts of You

06-05-2009

There is a great poem in this work, but not all of it is good poetry. The rhymes are what throw me off they seem to get in the way of the voice showing me, the reader, how it feels about the object of such praise and understanding. I understand that there is two authors, I feel the two of you can do some compassionate surgery and make this poem one someone would want to read more than once.

SuSpence

06/08/2009

Paulo, I took some advise and tryed working into a new poem, 'Realm of Delusion' so you should check it out and let me know what you think.

weatherman commented on Simply Thoughts of You

06-05-2009

Good maybe great sexy without any sex can't get enough of such poetry please enlighten the rest on how to write as such.

Poetry is what is lost in translation.

Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

SuSpence’s Poems (53)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Eyes Of Hazel One 6
Each New Day 16
The Tomorrow Dream 43
What See You 19
Nirvana (Haiku) 13
Sonnet 3 21
The Poetry Of Time 33
Mirrored Souls 33
My Open Broken Heart 20
Passing Thoughts 16
Sonnet 1 19
Ode To My Love 17
Angel With Butterfly Wings 20
Procrastinati
on
16
A Conversation in Appreciation 13
Miranda's Song 14
The Sarasota Blues 27
Highku 22
Tripping Stream of Consciousness 35
Along The River's Breath 51
Sometimes... 37
Transport 34
Love Never Knows 39
SuSpence's Dream 33
Ode to the Beatles (acrostic challenge) 18
The Generation Who Sold The World 30
Christine 24
Glenn Beck (Haiku) Compilation 32
The Tragic Tale of Alejandro Vega 56
Ballad of the Lost Man 32
Gulf of Fire (Haiku) 34
Fade to White 34
Ugly World 53
Searchin' for Love 26
Lost am I 28
Shards of Me 27
The Sadness, 10
The New Moon 18
I Imagine, 13
Lovesick, Lonesome Blues 11
SIX FOOT 11
Beautiful Poet 10
The Morning Sun 5
A Question for Love 13
Realm of Delusion 26
Simply Thoughts of You 9
Caught Staring 6
The Edge of the Headlands 3
In My Mind... 15
Thoughts of Natalia 14
A New Path 10
Daydream 12
Gone is my Sunshine 17