Peace

Running, faster and faster, for real this time
Away from home
Away from responsibility
Away from pain
Away…
Can’t seem to run far enough
Heart pounding
Every intake of breath another frigid fire in my lungs
Still farther
Still faster
Almost there
Almost where?

Stop

The world is spinning
A whirlwind of echoes and memories
Voices and faces replay scenes in my head
Things that I just want to forget
The things I ran away from

And then

All is quiet
I look around me
Searching desperately for a sign
Something to tell me I’m not alone in this world
That someone cares
That someone is watching over us
That someone will soothe my pain
That someone will give me direction
But nothing comes
All is still
There is an odd silence throughout the trees
No wind blowing
No rustling leaves
Just silence...
The loudest sign of all

Over at the lake now
The sun is setting as the birds give their last efforts at making their song heard
And the lake is the image of the sky
God’s beautiful painting
Such a calming picture
And there’s the perfect log
Directly in front of the setting sun
As I lay down, I wonder, what would happen if I didn’t return
If I just fell
Into the icy water
And filled my lungs with it
What would happen
Would they realize then?
Would someone know the pain that I’m in?
No, I answer myself
So it’s not worth it
I don’t think I could do it anyway

I close my eyes
And see nothing
No echoes
No memories
No faces
No pain
Peace at last