When I Feel Alone

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  • GypsyWoman
  • is at home with a cold! thinking of writing something...searching for inspiration...

When I Feel Alone

When I feel alone I think about this.
Where have I come to and where have I been?

When will the cycle stop washing whirlwinds of sin and oblivion
So that I may finally dry my eyes, and open them to find the light
Sequentially proper, without haste, to find comfort in my basketcase
See I once was a little girl with candy-coated dreams of the world
The taste so sweet that defeat could never inhabit my means
Laughing and playing, making ice-cream cones in a bubble bath
Yeah. My family never told me THAT happiness would last
I guess it's all just as well.
I held onto that until life forced me into this trip:
And I fell
Hit the floor hard too.
I guess looking back
I shouldn't have wanted to know what I never knew
When I feel alone, I think about this.
I reminisce on the days when I couldn't wait to awaken
Although it was sometimes hard to acheive the peace of sleep
The morning sunlight was a spoonful of ease I had no problem taking
Open up wide and let the rays bake my bare skin
I had nothing to hide

Nothing to run from, nothing to cry for

Except then, when I hit the floor
I merely ended up with a scraped knee
Even though the alcohol burned, it was healing
And I went back to dealing with the tasks at hand
Building castles in the sand and splashing in the bliss of life, untainted
Yeah, I miss those days.
When I feel alone, I think about this.
And even with all the memories of things that pleased me
I still have to ask myself, "Where have I been?"
When was the shroud of broken desires bought and
What was I doing when I should have fought the buyer?
The price was too high and now, I wish I would've kept the receipt
I could stay forever a child in my mind
But the purity would pull me in too deep and
I would drown

Drown in my fears, in my tears, in my life, in my plight
Damn
My rims so blurry I can barely see the light and I can't steer!
I want to revisit the beginning but the end is too near
And I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT THIS!
But I know that to move on, I must carry-on
This flight
A single small suitcase containing nothing breakable
Nothing that might crack or spill
No anger, despair, and nothing against my will
And I will arrive safely at the pretense of my past
Vast in courage, in faith, and in this light I will bask
Until the next rainy day relapse coaxes me to express that;
When I feel alone, I think about this.

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SILKYTWEED commented on When I Feel Alone

10-22-2009

Outstanding Write (Bravo....clapping)....also I believe this to be a cleansing write as I felt relief in the words you have shared....we have all been there and visit often still....so it ain't just me...(smile)....Thanks for sharing! Great work!

Poetry is not an expression of the party line. It's that time of night, lying in bed, thinking what you really think, making the private world public, that's what the poet does.

Allen Ginsberg (1926-1997) U.S. poet.

GypsyWoman’s Poems (4)

Title Comments
Title Comments
When I Feel Alone 1
Mirrored Sentiments 1
1Break-up-2-3
Make-up
2
Cascading Upward 3