Twisted

4 Comments

Tags:
  • Confusion

    Twisted
    Twisted
    By Earl Burnett


    I drank till I slept and slept till I drank
    There is no one to blame or no one to thank
    I'm tired of the torment and sick of the pain
    Now if things don't change I'll soon be insane
    My life has somehow spun out of control
    I fear for my life and I fear for my soul
    No one can help me it's all up to me
    So I look for a sign that might help me to see
    I will keep on looking for my chosen way
    But for now all I can do is to Hope and to Pray.

    Poem Comments

    (4)

    Please login or register

    You must be logged in or register a new account in order to
    leave comments/feedback and rate this poem.

    Login or Register

    dylandean commented on Twisted

    10-23-2009

    Good stuff. Confusion with a sense of hope. BTW, my fiance is from San Antonio.
    Reply to Comment

    Paolo commented on Twisted

    06-02-2009

    You say a lot in a few verses and well said also. I do have one observation, I would omit the and between slept and slept, all of the ands' except the last one. It is needed to carry through your rhythm. I'd also drop and the "or" between "blame" and "no". Try it and see if it doesn't tighten your delivery and make it more apparent.
    Reply to Comment

    Musicmynded1

    10/20/2009

    Good observations on the possible editing notations,,, I would roll with what you say. Good eye, good rythem

    TheAngelOfDeath commented on Twisted

    04-07-2009

    I love your poerty Scheme in ALL your poems.. you and me are some of the only people that acctuly do that!!! Great Work!
    Reply to Comment

    Poetry is what is lost in translation.

    Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

    erbj’s Poems (13)

    Title Comments Submitted
    Title Comments Submitted
    The Ride 0 09/17/2009
    My Dreams 3 03/10/2009
    New Life 1 03/10/2009
    Time 1 03/10/2009
    Twisted 4 03/10/2009
    Wishes 1 03/10/2009
    Stages 1 03/10/2009
    Quick Release 2 03/02/2009
    The End 2 12/04/2008
    Dad 1 12/04/2008
    The One That I Love 1 08/05/2009
    Distress 4 12/04/2008
    Hell it is! 2 12/04/2008
    Top of Page