A poetry challenge
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Re: Re: A poetry challengeQuote: Originally Posted by unknownpoet Welcome back,it's been awhile - now- what did you do? Walk past the beggars, like most people do? Or was it more sinister, thought threw and well planned ? Got what you wanted? Is that blood on your hands? You humans don't get it. You waste so much time, Each tear you cause others, is your choice - NOT MINE  nice one every persons hell is their own personal thing.....i'm loving this. |
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Re: WELCOME TO HELLQuote: Originally Posted by poett I thought you were an angel the day I met you everytime to my rescue it seemed that you flew with passionate kisses you promised me heaven your hugs and caress my pain did leaven I open my heart completely and gave it to you thats when I found out nothing was true your halo transformed to a pair of horns you made a queen with a crown of thorns My laughter turned into silent screams nightmares made me forget my dreams I became cold, numb and confused feeling used, abused and all bruised I prayed but my voice wasn't heard you made me think, what I said was absurd I forgot how to dance, sing, and smile became a loner bitter and hostile You wrapped me more each time you'd lie turned into thunderous gray my blue sky nothing mattered nothing I cared to see death was all I prayed to come for me I asked you constantly where was heaven but you left me alone crying in this awful cell so I became uccustomed to your dark haven now I am a monster I see it so well now you are who complains about me and gets so confused when I angrily yell you ask where is that angel I used to be but now its me who says Welcome to hell......... NOT BAD POETT YOUR FEELING IT 
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Re: Re: A poetry challengeQuote: Originally Posted by castlemist The B, B, and G midnight rain and sizzling tires hypnotize the city as i sail down sixth foggy steam settles, liquid weight sinking my conscious blurring white and yellow lines street lights melt against the windshield streaming down in random florescent dizzying beads… pop-pop-popping gravel grade the undercarriage whoa…shit!!! i pull the wheel left of instinct my blood pumps in my throat, a boney hand pressing my larynx and jugular bulging my eyeball veins scratched by the sands of sleep as adrenaline fades i turn on the a.c. wipe my forehead and blast the radio and old Elvis song zz…going to a party at the county jail…zz the rain subsides to neon signs flashing…pointing toward a driveway THE BRIMSTONE BAR AND GRILL “every hour is happy hour” parking lot’s empty but i see a crowd thru the window a cowbell rings as i open the door “what’s your pleasure?” asks a dark handsome bartender “ah, coffee…hot and black” “like your women” ha, ha there are no tables just booths wound in a maze i walk around a corner a woman in red touches my arm sending a wave of chills to my shoulders settling in the roots of my hair “buy a lady a drink?” “my name’s Samantha i work for free choice have you heard of us?” “yea, you’re that pro-abortion group that rallied at the Spectrum last weekend” “pro-women’s rights. why are you here?” “i pulled over for coffee” “yeah, right,” she snickers we walk past booth after filthy booth, an ammonia smell mixes with ether and alcohol like a hospital trauma ward or nasty book stores in Jersey in booth thirteen a man’s kissing a man while a gorgeous blonde watches and madly fingers herself “who are those men in booth thirty-one? looks like they’re playing cards poker, blackjack, or something” “mostly doctors and lawyers” she says with a wink “they lust for money and power vice sex” four men take turns with a redhead on a table for two filling each orifice i cringe as she screams mad, erotic curses number nine’s a dilly… a man’s getting a blowjob while loading a syringe when the woman finishes he shoots her again at last the bar “ a drink for the lady” i shout to the tender “Samantha,” he yells above the loud metal music “the usual?” “yeah, Stan, cocaine and a Collins” she pulls out a joint pressing it to my fingers “no thanks, i’m driving” Stan stares at Samantha they stare back at me and laugh to hysterics tears pour down their quivering cheeks i toss him a five and push the door open but i step in a cellar and smell rotting flesh men and women in bondage are being sexually tortured i see a young boy emasculated and crying “help me, mister help me!” i shove back thru the door into the club “Samantha please tell me how can i leave here?” she presses against me runs her hand up my thigh, “you can’t get out, silly boy why do you think they call ‘em bars?” from http://emotionography.net/ Jerry Browning©2009 NOT REALLY WHAT I HAD IN MIND BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE HELL COULD BE.....GOOD WRITE. 
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Re:Welcome to hellOn high cliffs a mind slips off with a loss of its mental grip Last edited by xylo 05-21-2009 at 10:04:19 AM |
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Re: WELCOME TO HELLQuote:
Originally Posted by poett I thought you were an angel the day I met you everytime to my rescue it seemed that you flew with passionate kisses you promised me heaven your hugs and caress my pain did leaven I open my heart completely and gave it to you thats when I found out nothing was true your halo transformed to a pair of horns you made a queen with a crown of thorns My laughter turned into silent screams nightmares made me forget my dreams I became cold, numb and confused feeling used, abused and all bruised I prayed but my voice wasn't heard you made me think, what I said was absurd I forgot how to dance, sing, and smile became a loner bitter and hostile You wrapped me more each time you'd lie turned into thunderous gray my blue sky nothing mattered nothing I cared to see death was all I prayed to come for me I asked you constantly where was heaven but you left me alone crying in this awful cell so I became uccustomed to your dark haven now I am a monster I see it so well now you are who complains about me and gets so confused when I angrily yell you ask where is that angel I used to be but now its me who says Welcome to hell......... Whey! Whey! Whey! OMG! This piece has real "gut" feeling. I hope the poetess didn't suffer the experience of this her lament. Good luck , next round! |
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Re: Re:Welcome to hellQuote: Originally Posted by xylo On high cliffs a mind slips off with a loss of its mental grip endorphen ice chips drain rain down filling cavernous pits creating steam caustic in the flameing abyss minds of the remisce thoughts of wrong doings perform tumbles and flips wondering which bumbling wish weather crumbling hindsight caused a reactive twitch and that demon or this placed hate on the trigger and pull it like this blowing candles of life out extinguishing wicks! catch a penalty oh shit!! its dark in this pit!! loud and devoid of light and hot in this bitch!! no water to quench the tonsils creating mist in which to qwell thirst the liquid boils when one spits! welcome to hell!! the devils oasis of bliss! lava bath of the sick! caustic realm of those wronged or killed by the spastically vish! (viscious) Xylo. Excellent material for a surrealistic presentation. Needs to be redone Needs versification. Sounds and looks like notes for a great poem relevant to the "Welcome To Hell" theme. (Xylo, which I suspect is the abbreviation of xylophone-lol) needs to rework this piece, please. Last edited by cousinsoren 05-21-2009 at 12:34:13 PM |
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Re: A poetry challengeHell Posted, |
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Re: Re: Re: A poetry challengeQuote: Originally Posted by JadedJezzabel Originally Posted by kdavidscott1 Welcome To Hell Welcome to hell I'm glad that you came, You're stuck with me now with no one to blame. I spoke and you listened you completed my deed, The murder and mayhem the hearts you made bleed. The rapes you committed the lives that you took, Like the couple you killed while they sat at the brook. Your father and mother they raised just right, Showing you the light but you walked in the night. On their knees they stay praying that you'd be changed, You listened to my voice and became more deranged. That's when it all started you joined with my force, You killed the young and old completing the course. Your blood path reached heaven God gave me your name, Your parents sent their prayers I'm glad that you’ve came. Welcome to hell where you don't want to be, Your parents tried to tell you not to listen to me. When you started killing and the word got to them, They asked God to deal with you and all this mayhem. God gave you to me and said torture him well, So stop all that screaming and welcome to hell. Welcome To Hell – A Place Where You Don’t Want To Be…Amen Written By: David L. Scott excellent but you should have just posted it on your poems I did post it on my poems |
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WordSlinger vs The VolcanoHey Jez, Weez e the nus god blesss us the whlole ewhlozeplanety is sleppy theyzee snUUz |
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Re: A poetry challenge/Dahlusionhttp://www.originalpoetry.com/in-sighting |
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Re: A poetry challengeQuote: Originally Posted by JadedJezzabel write a poem with the title "welcome to hell" and post it. when you do just reply here with a quick "hell posted" so who ever wants to can go read you hell. " "hell Posted" check it out hell posted by poetrygal45 |
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Re: A poetry challengehell posted.... |
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Re: Re: Re: Re: A poetry challengeQuote: Originally Posted by kdavidscott1 Originally Posted by JadedJezzabel Originally Posted by kdavidscott1 Welcome To Hell Welcome to hell I'm glad that you came, You're stuck with me now with no one to blame. I spoke and you listened you completed my deed, The murder and mayhem the hearts you made bleed. The rapes you committed the lives that you took, Like the couple you killed while they sat at the brook. Your father and mother they raised just right, Showing you the light but you walked in the night. On their knees they stay praying that you'd be changed, You listened to my voice and became more deranged. That's when it all started you joined with my force, You killed the young and old completing the course. Your blood path reached heaven God gave me your name, Your parents sent their prayers I'm glad that you’ve came. Welcome to hell where you don't want to be, Your parents tried to tell you not to listen to me. When you started killing and the word got to them, They asked God to deal with you and all this mayhem. God gave you to me and said torture him well, So stop all that screaming and welcome to hell. Welcome To Hell – A Place Where You Don’t Want To Be…Amen Written By: David L. Scott excellent but you should have just posted it on your poems I did post it on my poems i know i'm sorry i read it commented and rated it, i loved it |
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Re: A poetry challengeeveryone needs to check hell according to poetrygal45..............its hott!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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Re: A poetry challengeI'm new to this website. I saw your challenge and decided to post my poem. It was originally titled "Edge of (In)Sanity", but it certainly fits the Welcome to Hell theme. I'd certainly like to know what everyone thinks. |
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Re: Re: A poetry challengeQuote:
Originally Posted by unknownpoet Welcome back,it's been awhile - now- what did you do? Walk past the beggars, like most people do? Or was it more sinister, thought threw and well planned ? Got what you wanted? Is that blood on your hands? You humans don't get it. You waste so much time, Each tear you cause others, is your choice - NOT MINE |
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Re: A poetry challengegood one unknown poet |
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Re: A poetry challengeWelcome To Hell |
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Re: A poetry challengegood one lady jay |
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Re: A poetry challengeHell posted |
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Re: A poetry challengePeople don't get over hell when they dwell on it.I know you don't want my opinion either.I understand your point.Why do you want to dwell on peoples burdens?Not to be an ass.Just asking. |
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Re: A poetry challengebecause for a lot of creative types.....me included.......going through hell and really having to struggle with an issue or getting your smashed once again or internal conflict or depression and profound sadness inspires us to develope what ever art form we are drawn to........you can't have me believe that you never went throgh a hard time and came out better from it due to being able to express it all in a creative way.....thats why !!!!!!!! |
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Re: A poetry challengeif you didnt like the challenge....then you should not take it but don't fault those who did take it and created great poems!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats what self expression is all about........thank you |
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Re: A poetry challengesherriee1........i love a poem based on something positive as well......i'm just not so good at writing them.....you should send out a positive poetry challenge that is a direct contrast from the one I put out. like a "when you walk through the gates of heaven" or a " what would you say to saint peter at the gates" or " life review with god" something like that. or any other challenge you can come up with to get creative and positive juices flowing.......i can't wait |
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Re: A poetry challengePoem posted |
Poetry is either something that lives like fire inside you or else it is nothing, an empty formalized bore around which pedants can endlessly drone their notes and explanations.
Unknown Source