Who are you, what is your name, where did you come from, who do you claim?
I can’t help but to wonder all these things. As I pass you from time to time- longing for that greeting-thinking maybe you could be mine! Oh- how I enjoy taking those short walks… up the way, down the way, and arooound to the corner market (Lol); hoping I see you again…hoping the next time we cross paths- you’d stop and say “hello Miss Pretty Lady, how was your day?”

At night when I lay alone that empty place in mind begins to wonder- who are you, what is your name, where do you live, and I can be claimed. It might sound crazy, but I have you every night, lusting for the day you’ll lay me down- holding nothing back… give me your all baby mm-mm, oh how I can feel you now!

As I dress for the new day, fresh as summer flowers…sexy as I can be- hustling to our meeting place- thinking today is going to be the day. Mmmm my Lord there you are… sitting at Maples Café, reading the Wall Street Journal- I’m wondering what should I say- hello, hello sir? Damn!! Come on girl- it ain’t never been this hard… it’s you… Ms. Beal get it together before he gets up and walks away! Taking slow DEEP breaths as I approach, heart pacing, hands sweaty and I fe-el… like I maaay throw up! In my sexiest voice I began to say “excuse me, but May I sit down” but of course he replies- okay BITCH the hard part is over! “I don’t really know how to say this sooo I’m just going to say it… but I dream of you almost every night I hope you don’t think I’m nuts, but I see you all of the time …you never seem to be with anyone are you married, what is your name… are you from around here, Lord help me this man is going to think I’m insane! BUT to my surprise he smiles and replies “no not anymore, Omar is my name and yes I live right above you in building 4 (he laughs) - Ooh how I restrain myself every night from knocking on your door! I can smell the scent of your perfume, Chanel right? (I smile), I even know when you are bathing- the steam fogs up my bathroom mirrors -cuz you know HEAT rises. I swear I’m dreaming I can’t believe this is happening. I’m wanting this man more and more! Mm-mm-mm just one casual conversion… I was in lust, but not in the way that I thought I’d be, it’s like he was feeding my heart and caressing my soul- all the shit that I so desperately needed, oh I’m telling you, he aroused my intellect- he had me intrigued.

As time passed…we had become fond of each other- spending practically everyday together, he was now my lover. We’d take walks in the park…bathe in the sun, we’d even watched the stars light up the night- we had so much fun. When I’m with him it’s like nothing else matters- I finally feel free, he has me laaaid out… just like a platter, a platter of peace and serenity, this dude is really into me.

Passion fills my mind -his touch blinds my soul, I can’t think of nothing else- I love this man to death.

Now that I’m open, vulnerable and free- I am unable to see what has come over me.
He treats me like a queen, takes the time to say YES, of course now I’m thinking “prayer really pays off- cuz I must be blessed”. But what seems great isn’t always true. I heard from a little birdie “Girrl he ain’t no good for you” so now I’m lost and confused, stuck in a daze… “Whateva” thinking oh-please she’s just jealous that bitch must be crazed.

Overwhelmed by all the gifts-I’m talking about sparkling diamonds, watches, clothes, purses, shoes, all shiny things-not realizing this was a distraction to blind me with- from seeing all of his many flings.

I’m trying not to feed into these possible lies- so I’d keep my mind on all that he supplies. “You are stupid” is what they say, girl that Nigga got you in disarray.

Now my mind is starting to wonder, so I confront him- question him- but he’s not telling me a thing, all he can say is them hoes just want to see you suffer. So you know what I’m about to do, I’m about flip the game on his ass and see who’s really been true- why would they lie- keeps crossing my mind, but why would he lie- this shit is for the birds and I ain’t got the time. I will not be played by either side, why won’t everybody just mind their own business- this is my Dime! Lord help me put the pieces together, my heart is hurting and I don’t know why- I’m not even sure if what they say is true or is it a lie -oh well that don’t even matter at this point, time to play detective… time to snoop and time to pry.

You know that saying “you seek and you shall find” well its true ~yep~ that Nigga was lying. Now I’m furious, pissed to the highest of pistivity! If that’s really a word…oh well DAMN IT it’s my word today! He’s been cheating-freaking all over town, why did I not see this coming? How could I have been sooo foolish? I promised myself just last year I would never go though this! And here I am crying for days and all he can say is “baby I’m gonna change”. I should have known, why should you be any different- you pretended to be Mr. Wonderful slash Mr. Magnificent. Okay I’ll admit I fell for your fame hum (Lol) I should known!!! Yall men play too many damn games. You’re a nasty cheat yet a beautiful liar- I should get real doggish …and post yo cheating ass in the esquire! But it wouldn’t even matter, I’m still gonna hurt- it’s all of my fault- I just had to flirt. You had me, I just knew you were the best… you’re no Mystery Man… you are just like the rest!