I live in a  prison that has no fences,No walls and No gaurds
but it is a place from which I can not escape. I spend my days
feeling like all that I have been taught to believe with my heart and my mind have all been lies. I wasted my youth and energy on the hope I might be accepted but my efforts were all in vain.
I have seeked solutions through knowledge,religion and philosophy and yet to my own dismay all the roads I have traveled take me to the same destination. The land of Nothingness.A place where nothing matters,Hopes thoughts and dreams are passed off as casual chit chat to passers by and Honor,honesty and trust are words you find in the History books but have long since gone out of style. It is a place where my thoughts burn like a hot poker against my face. How I ended up in such a place I am still not sure of. But I know my sentence is for life without a possibility of parole. How could I have missed the mark by so much?My spirit feels as if I am from another time and place that was long ago and I got trapped here in a time warp.I know most days who I am just not what I am. Am I a bad dream or a ghost or simply just a freak of nature. Maybe on that hot august day in 62 I was not supposed to survive but somehow did.The only thing that is constant for me is the need for understanding. I feel as those sometimes there is a magnetic field that is disrupting my mental compass and I can not seem to get back on course and find my way home. My addictions and My afflictions run like rivers through my souland Ihave cuts so deep they never have time to heal. I find myself getting older and feeling more misguided than ever.  Just about the time I am ready to give up and end my journey I hear the voice from with in. And so as my time in this prison goes by I set with my thoughts and peacefully wait for the rare times when I am moved to go forward by the voice from with in