I’m sitting in the trap house getting high. There’s so much smoke in the air

I got tears pouring from my eyes. There’s no need for me to tell lies.

I’m crying on the inside. I’m dying on the inside. I have so much on my mind. I’m in search of this peace I can’t seem to find.

I need to get my head straight, but wait I think it’s too late. I’m about to go insane. My life’s so twisted wow things have changed.

I often times forget to say my name.

What a shame. This not some sort of game.

So many thought traveling through my head, so I close my eyes only to see red. Am I dead? Yes Am dead to the things around. I hurting but I am never down.

I have so much pressure on my chest I must write so I can release this stress. Dear God I pray, God seem as if my life is floating away. I got my wife constantly tell me that am cheating everyday.

Hold on dear is I not here? Whenever you call am I not near. I know I’ve hurt you in the past year, please have no fear. Trust and believe me when I say I am here. Get all those jealous females out your ear.

I have much to say but first I must pray.

Dear God please save me today. I have all these problems in my life. Can someone tell me where is Christ. Please God spare my life.

God where were you when I lost my child? The one I prayed to you for a while.

I receive a call my wife is pregnant with child, man my face caught a smile

I prayed to the son, I looked to the sun, I just lost my son.

First the sunshine now here comes the rain. I just lost the child that I once have gained. Now I have a hurt that doesnt seem to go away. God can you feel me is the prayer that I pray. Please take away this hurt to day.

I am crying on the inside that sometimes spread to the outside. I found myself covering myself so I could hide.

I still walked with pride.

Walk is what I had to do for months when I lost my car. God my walk in life seem so very far.

The ones I help couldn’t or wouldn’t help me. Remember when we were we? How did we become just me?

I listened to words and whispers as they began to fly. People were asking each other why.

Why was I going through such lost? The must forgot God is my boss.

His son died on the cross.

I’m been put to the test. In the end God will pull out of me my best.

I’m crying on the inside, bleeding on the inside. I'm so depressed I wanted to put my head down in shame.

I way too much pride I will continue to take my step in stride. Watch me as I glide. Gliding right through this what I’m going through. Lord what more can I do?

Remember I lost my car, my child, now here goes my home. My mind is so gone. They increase my interest rate. When I found out it was much too late.

Now they are talking about a recession. I’ve been in a recession. Can you feel my aggression?

On top of everything I was dealing with my aunt that molested me pasted a way. My hurts are increasing everyday.

In spite of what she did I loved her anyway. Dear God is the pray I continue to prayer. As the song I trust you begins to play.

How can I trust you when the pain inside make you seem so far away? Dear God I pray.

This song is helping me go through. When things begin to happen I ask myself what’s new?

The lord gives it and the lord take it away bless it be his name. Still I remain.

I have a daughter whom I fathered who I barely see. When I see her in her I see me.

When will I become free? Free from all the stress in my life.

Do I not display the image of Christ?

I lost my car twice. That’s right twice. I after my car got fixed two days later I got into a wreck.

My car got totaled out. Man I’m about to shout. I feel like pulling my hair out.

God you promised to not put no more on me than I can bare. I starting to wonder do you care? Seem as if you not there.

I feel so alone all the ones I thought had my back are now gone. You said you’ll never leave me nor forsake me, but where are thee?

Dear God I know you hear my prayer. I know you somewhere but where? My life’s twisted just like my hair.

I’m still strong despite what’s going on.

I’m in a fight I can’t seem to win.

When is the wind going to blow my way?

Then all these hurts can go away.

God I know you trying to get my attention.

So let me pause to mention I’m listening.

At times when I were walking I watched those I help as the passed by. And with a wave they said hello and goodbye.

I lifted my head high to caught the tear that drop from my eye. I know they saw me with my hands in the sky

. Dear God I praying until I die. As long as I have breath I will cry Dear God.

No back to my beau she always telling me I’m out of here it’s through. How can 2 that should be one are not.

Since we had been going through I guess you forgot. We got married we became one. When I tell you I love you is not for fun. Push past the past beau

Trust and believe me I love you that’s true. Dear God I’m trying to be that man from within.

You are the only one I can depend. Some say I have swagger. That’s only to camouflage the disappointments on the inside.

I trapped in a tide. I 'm riding high, still stay fly.

I am man but sometime I do cry.

I’m trying to express how I feel.

Sometimes I want to give up for real.

Before I get on my knees God please give me your hand then I can say amen.

You promised to be my farther.

I would ask you for help but why bother. I’m just trying to go farther. So please help me father. I’m trying to find my way. You are the way. So everyday I Dear God I pray.