Brian's Pure Love for His Lady

0 Comments

Brian's Pure Love for His Lady


Brian's old cell phone has been discontinued for years.
I remember showing him how to text with it; I recall
How happy he was to find it had a camera and video-cam.
Those were the days when I had helped him forget his early tears;
Tears like those I shed when I too was a teen,
And some people visited on me inexplicable vitriol,
Saying things that were harshly unkind and mean--
And also, as I only realized much later, were a sham,
As false as their lying lips were cruel;
Mocking me because I was so much more intelligent than they,
And always got an A.
But just as happened to Brian, they made me feel inferior;
I understood well the pain in Brian's deep interior,
And I taught him to know he was good, the best I ever met.
Scars form when wide wounds heal; but the depth of pain
I helped Brian to stop feeling, though he could never forget.
And in his new-found self-esteem,
He pursued his dream of finding love.
He met a young lady who led him to believe
That she would marry him; a day he dreamed of.
Brian was a Christian, and she called herself one, too.
I can't know if she deliberately set out to deceive;
But I know the dreams she inspired in Brian never came true.
Brian understood her Christian wish for waiting to be wed,
Before the happiness of company could include a good time in bed.
Sometimes, for a woman, religion can be an effective cover
To explain why she doesn't want to be a good man's lover.
But Brian was willing to wait, and looked happily forward.
And their dates together gave him great happiness,
Seasoned with his dreams.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Recently, I came across Brian's old cell phone,
And I found in it videos he took of his beloved.
His image was there, too; with great joy his smiling face shone--
For with her, he felt fulfilled as a man, and did not feel alone.
Sometimes they got someone to video-record them together;
And a solid loving couple they certainly seemed.
I remember looking forward to being Brian's best man,
When the day would come that they would tie the marriage tether.
I recall how excitedly and happily he talked of her,
And how happy I was for him, that he had found true love.
The best video is the one of them on the gondala; on blue water,
Reflecting the blue sky shining above;
And Brian's smiles and laughter were like a child at Christmas,
After opening the package of the best gift he had ever hoped to have.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
But what had been presented as a seemly Christian wait,
Became for Brian a twisting turn of fate:
Twisting like a knife embedded
In his trusting loving heart that expected to be wedded;
For just like that, she suddenly announced
That she was leaving--moving out of the State--
Words that ripped him as if a predatory beast had pounced;
And Brian smiled at her, through his pain--
Though he was deeply grieved, feeling totally trounced,
Deeply depressed--his new self-esteem shattered,
Feeling he was losing his true love, all that really mattered,
And feeling inferior again, and as if guilty of some sin,
To explain his pain--feeling again unworthy of happiness,
Worthless, loveless, and not fitting in.
Just as, long before, when he was a little boy and a naive teen,
He had been cruelly spoken to, and treated so heartlessly mean.
But he covered it up for her with cheerful words and a forced grin.
He even helped her repair her car to leave the State; and then,
When she had gone, he collapsed--a complete break-down.
I found him in a very bad way, and I helped him to stand again.
But this time, he never fully recovered, he was never fully the same.
But I helped him regain self-esteem, and re-learn the love of life.
Though sometimes I would see him looking sad, feeling bad,
Remembering his happy days of believing she would be his wife.
But he would shake off the sadness, and embrace the days of life.
I helped him; later, he helped me, when I fell
Into the depth of fear and pain, with cancer, a living hell--
Then I helped him again, when cancer caught him too--
I became his care-taker--but then we helped each other,
With a friendship of total trust and mutual understanding and care;
Together we fought off cancer's curse of pain and fear and despair,
And we helped each other stand when one would fall,
And we stood by each other's side--until he died.
We helped each other to be happy, when happiness was hard to find.
But I knew Brian's heart well, and I knew his mind.
I know he would have been much happier--
If his pure love for his lady had been equally returned--
If she had fulfilled the promise of becoming his bride.
I saw and heard the highest height of happiness in him,
In those videos--beaming with joy and pride--
When she was by his side.


==============================
Written by Michael LP, aka PoetWithCancer
aka (thanks to my dear friend Luna Marie) Mr. Poet
Written on Friday, December 2, 2011  1:33 AM PST
49 degrees F.   Humidity: 33%    Forecast: overcast
Copyright (C) 2011 by Michael LP.  All rights reserved
(Copyrighted for my estate)

Poem Comments

(0)

Please login or register

You must be logged in or register a new account in order to
leave comments/feedback and rate this poem.

Login or Register

Poetry is what is lost in translation.

Robert Frost (1875-1963) American Poet.

PoetWithCancer’s Poems (224)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Happy Winter Solstice 1
Seasonal Ring 1
My Thanksgiving 0
God's Word 1
Under the Date Tree 1
A Few More Times 1
Divine and Diabolical World 0
Summer-Brief 2
Seasonal Ring 0
Shakespeare's Birthday and Death 0
Special Brian 0
I Remember Brian 0
Light of Life 0
Pain Has Defeated Me Today 1
The Old, Old Words 0
Home Is Where the Heart Is 0
A Sad Contemplative Christmas Today 0
Moments of Memory; In Memory of Moments 0
Sun and Rain, Joy and Pain: I Miss My Friend Brian 0
Dehumanized and Clinicized--N
OT
1
Not Full 0
Love, Loss, and Lennon 0
Dying Dream 0
Brian's Pure Love for His Lady 0
Two Loved Ladies Undergoing Surgery Now 0
The Masks Fall Off at Midnight 1
Prime of Life 1
Low Energy and Less Time: And Too Many Things to Do 1
Happy Veterans Day, Brian 0
Happy Veterans Day, Brian 0
Thanksgiving 0
Autumn of Year; Autumn of Life 0
Brian's Birthday and New Year's Eve 0
Under a Constant Star (9/11) 0
Deep Time 0
Is There Anything Out There 2
Classics in the Closet 0
Nobody 0
Feeling the Wind 0
The Wild Doe and the Hunter 0
Happy Birthday, Brian 0
The End of the World: Saturday, May 21, 2011, 6 pm PDT 1
Brian's Special Smile 0
Broken Birth 0
Missing Brian 0
Focus: Today, Happy 0
I Love You, Brian 0
The Ways and the Words of You 1
Stone Cry 0
Amore Immortale 0
Reality and Unreality 1
Lyrical Life 1
Easter 0
Shakespeare's Birthday 0
Friends During Need 1
Death--A Play--or the Final Act 0
Moods 0
I Was Worried About You 0
Song of Life 2
Me 1
Oh Mother of My Life, My Mind, My Heart--Happy Birthday (Sunday, April 3, 2011) 0
Your Money or Your Life 1
Poesis 0
A Last Look at the Moon 0
Tears for Brian: My Tears Spring Suddenly 0
Seventeen in the Past 1
Clusters 1
Suffering and Dying Where Love Is Least 1
Looking at People in a Restaurant, Talking to Brian 1
Brian Cannot Come Back to Me 3
Seven for Heaven: Human Haiku/Senryu, On Two Straight Guys Who Loved Each Other 3
Five Human Haiku (Senryu): Faithful to the Perfect Form 0
The Scream 3
Life Is 8
Following My Friend 3
Small Moments (Written by Patricia, for Brian) 1
For Precious Michael (Written by Patricia, for me) 4
Dream of Life, Dream of Friendship, Dream of Love 4
The Power to Create 4
A Single Fortune Cookie 6
The Meaning of Life 2
Dreamless 3
Prayers 3
Lost Love 2
I Thank My Mother for My Birthday and for Her Wonderful Mother Love 3
Lennon Lost His Life: And Now, So Has Teena Marie 2
All the Way with Part Way 2
Loving, Living, and Dying 6
Dreaming and Seeming 3
Poem Prayer 2
Science, Poetry, Philosophy, and More 2
Super A, Abuelita1--Th
ank You for Your Support, Caring Love, and Understanding
2
Wonderful Connie 1
Someday-Dying 2
Between Yes and No 3
Love of Life 1
Zappa the Magnificent 1
In the Midst of Life 2
Only One Death 1
Real Illusion 1
The Unknown 1
My Apparently Known Possible Fates in This World 1
No More Me 2
Someone 2
Leaving Life 1
Precious Jade 2
Fear and Grief and Going: Unguilty of the Grave 1
Using and Losing Time 1
Loveless Life 2
Good Life, Good Grief 1
Dreamless 1
Ontology versus Oncology 1
Now Time 2
No Present, No Future: All Past 3
Hippocratic Hell 1
First Light 2
Almost At the Limit [--A Sonnet] 1
Death-Trap 0
Broken 1
Birthday Termination 1
Moments 1
First and Last Cry 1
Love 2
Final Fragility 1
End of the World 1
Tripping 1
Seasonal Ring 1
Gifts that Go and Still Stay 1
Sidney Says: Advice to Poets and All Writers 3
Enthusiasm: God Within 3
Send Me Your Good Will, or Pray For Me--Please 1
Feeling Each Other's Pain 1
Snow Man for a Low Man 0
Explanation of My Poem "As If the Last" 2
New Year, No Love 2
Poetic Form 0
Guilty Pleasures: Not Guilty 2
About Me 1
Live, Laugh, and Love 4
Nothing Special 2
Why a Writer Writes 2
To Sarah Y and Her Beloved Little Boy Who Cries Out: Again! 1
I and You: Unique and the Same 1
Where's the Compasssion in Our Health Care System? 0
Lonely Girl, I'm Feeling the Way You're Feeling: But We Can Both Make It Through 3
Health-Care Reform and Hell on Earth 3
Psyche 3
My Bucket List (For Now) 4
My Most SCARED Moments 2
Children of the Stars 2
Passing Life's Test 1
Why More Now? 1
Remembering My Grandma on Thanksgiving Eve 3
Another Thursday, Another Hammer 4
Thursday's Hammer 1
New Birthday 2
Let Love of Life Light Up the Psyche of Fawn 1
To Angel Eyes: The Wonders of Your Life 1
Regarding the Lack of Fall in Texas 2
Light for the Fight 2
All That I Have 3
Shine 2
As If the Last 2
Here Now 1
All in Time 2
The Exile 2
Incurable and Terminal 4
Tripping 2
One More Tomorrow 1
My Dash 4
One of Two Is Stronger 1
No More Romeo; No More Juliet 1
Friendship and Life 1
Snow and Life 3
Live Spelled Backwards 1
Sarah Y 2
To Fly 2
My Cry 1
Moment of Madness 2
Fall From a Great Height 1
A Memory 1
Less Life; No Loving 2
A Loser, True 2
Time Stop 1
Final Sleep 1
Entre Enfer 1
Flying Life 1
One Would Have Been Enough to Make Life Worth Living 5
Once 3
The Haiku Form 2
Bridge to a Comet--Your Visits and Comments to Me 4
Get Well Soon, Luna Marie 2
Winging It (a human haiku, or senryu) 3
Light Locomotive 2
Skite, Where Were You Today? Where Are You Tonight? 2
Angel's Wings, Angel's Voice 4
Shy, but Not Too Shy 2
High Coo 4
From Night to Night 3
Life's Journey's End--Cut Short by Cancer 4
Love, Light, Life, and Night 2
Fear and Courage 1
Death in Life 3
Unknown Final Fate 3
To Right a Poem 4
Crab-Like Concealed 4
Soon 2
All in the Mind 3
Ebony Shine 3
On My Nephew Naming His First-Born Son After Me 5
Love, Loss, and Lennon 3
Eqinox 4
Feeling My Heart 5
The Best Person I Ever Knew: My Best Friend--Brian 2
In Memoriam, George Difficult 3
Lovers 7
Art 5
Things to Do 4
Plane on Fire 3
Ameliorator 5
Thanksgiving 7
Worlds of Light 24
Failure's Fortress 13
Song of Life (Original Version) 13