10 years I travelled a road taken by many. Condemning me, erasing my spirit, dragged through trials to distraught my inability to do me, longing for the love of a boy whom portrays to be a man, mixed up in his family and his ways without no clue to the hell I was going to walk through. Bore two children with reminisce of the demon I’ve grown to hate. Crippled spirit, driven into the ground. Disrespected, tormented, and forever betrayed. 10 years I travelled this road most women take. Mislead to believe that together you could achieve. Only to be forsaken, abuse and used mentally and emotionally. Financially burdened for he is not of god’s image. Only to receive closure when he deems his self angry, only Can I truly, except his meaning with less heart ache because he knows no other way. As his words are etched across my heart that already has hardened from previous years the words of closure are revealed: “If I wanted to be with you, I would have done right by you by now.” Ten years later and the bastard now can form a sentence that makes sense. With relief of why I could no longer give half nor my all. Peace sank deep into my heart, cleared my hatred and mended my soul, attached me whole.  Where only my body could tolerate what my mind could not, what my emotions would not, why my soul’s desire for a man, a boy would only take flight in nothingness. He at one time seemed to be my all, only to realize that he that, I was each other’s down fall out of the madness and sadness bore to beautiful girls who I hold dear for they are mine. Rest assure that one day we will cross paths and those whores he chose, those Canadian pennies over American authenticity he chose shit over sugar, plastic over porcelain, iron over pure gold, trolls over the goddess, he chose to desecrate our unity with nothing. This boy I thought of as my man is nothing more than a great sperm donation. Where ever life sends you I hope a semi truck follows stand in front of it and let it engulf you. If the piss from my body would save your life ask not if I would, know that I would not sprinkle or flood you drip or moistened you for nothing would oblige me to be the Samaritan, nothing would allow me to speak words be they foul or just. Let my silence lead you where my words could not in happiness like my heart once said when I’m done I will be when I’m finished I will remember you from beginning to end for not am I only the better woman I was the treasure. Douse in all the glories of humbleness now in tow with great dissatisfaction to speak for conversation between us will not be. 10 years you took from me and 10 years I watched the bitch you became to be.