My downfall

2 Comments

Tags:
  • Emotional

    My downfall
    I was alone
    Waiting for the sun to fall down
    Playing with fine sands
    All sitting beside

    Tears falling from my eyes
    The dryness of the sun turn to wet
    I never noticed, I started to cry
    I was dumb, I want to fly

    I can’t remember how it started
    I am scared, hopeless and weak
    Nobody comfort my loneliness
    Even he doesn’t really care

    Now it hurts…

    I don’t want to weep and waste my entire moan
    Thinking for the man who broke my heart
    Is it my fault or what?
    Maybe he just don’t deserve me at all

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    optimistic commented on My downfall

    07-14-2009

    The first four line stanza really was awesome it open up the poem with opportunity. I like the mere thought on how you expressed your pain well. In time the storm will past in the mean time keep pushing great write.
    Reply to Comment

    wubuj

    09/09/2009

    welll...thank you...love more...

    ccslim commented on My downfall

    07-14-2009

    Sweet write! I like the content of inner torment, well not I like more so I like how you portrayed it! wOOt!
    Reply to Comment

    To have great poets there must be great audiences too.

    Walt Whitman, American Poet (1819-1892)

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