All joy is lost when death speaks; to fell the pain is most of me. I can’t fell friends anywhere as I fall deeper into my madness.
I see people look at me, but I’m not really there. They only see what around me, not the pain inside. My heart wants someone to hold me, when no one is around. I look for someone to find me but no one really there.
The light of the sun can’t warm me, or the love of a friend. The pain of the cuts may come and go but the sadness never ends. I cry at the pain inside me, I cry at the dark. The devils eye’s watch me, as I wait for the pain to fall out of my wrist.
I can hear death knocking on my bedroom door, as I cry to the still night. A knife of sadness in my chest so deep god can’t get it out.
I can here the knock and soon I will answer, with pain so deep it scares me. My home is not safe, my friends do not know that my body is not fighting and death is my only way out.
I can’t see someone to love and I know they can’t love me. Not a friend, or family, or any other thing. I’m an outcast to the pain, to hate and sadness. Here to the dark in which I now live were the pain is every were, there’s no running away. It’s there in my chest you just can’t see it.I felt so much pain that it’s all I have, it’s my friend, family, love that I can’t live without. It’s the child I’ll never have, for I’m too lost in madness. I’m too afraid of the blackness of the night but too afraid to face the sadness. I’m trapped somewhere in the devils playground where there nothing I can do.I hide the pain as a way to live, to not let anyone know how I hear Death next to me pulling at my soul. I can see the knife rising and slowly and then cutting in. The pain is coming out in a red liquid all over the place.
I can hear death knocking on my bedroom door as I cry to the still night. A knife of sadness in my chest so deep god can’t get it out.
So I’ll get up and answer the door, I’ll let sadness and pain take all of me, I can’t do good bye’s but some say that it’s not the end just the start of a new beginning.
Hello.