11/11/08

What I saw that hurtful night
Filled my heart with anger which built- up with the sunlight
What I never expected to see my husband holding her and not me
With my own eyes I did see
Not to hear it by word of mouth
I hit him so hard it turned his head south
I was told by him and all that it was just a game
But to me it was disrespectful all the same.
I finally realized what was always there
The urge he had to hold another woman he did not care
He knew what he was doing all the same
It was not just a simple game
That was the longest night of my life
The night I stopped being his wife
With all the hurt and deception I felt inside
All I could see was black with pure hate in my
eyes
My hands had a mind of there own
when I went toward his face full blown.
I couldn’t of stopped even if I wanted to
I wanted him to pay for what I felt the hurt the pain there is no help.
Revenge is going to be so sweet
When he sees who I am with
It won’t be the first time they meet
What hurt so bad it was done in front of my eyes
The hurt it caused the blood tears I cried
His life I was gonna take
But that would have been my grand mistake
Better now that he can feel the pain the cost of his little game
He doesn’t care, cause to him I am just a whore
Not his wife cause there is no respect
Maybe one day his stupidity he may regret
Respect I lost for him that night not just because I was his wife
Something that can never change and always be present
I know that he was the man I never knew and I will always regret it
You can only hold things in so long before it comes out and things go wrong
Now I see I never knew that man who shared bed with me
I regret the day I said “ I do” the man I married
“who was he” who?
I fear for something I cannot control
the rage that’s in me the hate I feel
The betrayal will never heal.
While he lays there in his peaceful sleep
I think of ways to take his life without a single weep.
Thoughts run through my head they won’t let me sleep
My eyes wide open and the thoughts running so deep
Voices say do it now, it’s so very easy you know how
Just one simple movement it all it takes
With that he will never awake
I pray to God to take the pain and the thoughts away
But to no avail it is growing stronger with every passing day
I know its time to walk away
revenge makes me stay
I want him to hurt like he has hurt me
All will turn out right
Destiny will prevail watch and see