If I die tomorrow don’t u cry, don’t shed a tear
Don’t cry for me I am finally happy, no more pain, no more pretence, no more fear……………………..
I smile everyday but it’s not real, it’s just the mask I wear
And everyone’s fooled or maybe blind or maybe they just don’t care
Because no one sees the anger, no one sees the pain, no one sees the pretence
That is permanently there
I live my life for the ones I love, my family and special friends
I need not say ur name because u know self very well
Everyday I wonder and everyday I wait for something special to happen………………
I’m still waiting
Today is May 9, 2009, exactly 5:46 pm and I am sitting in my room thinking of u yeah u the one reading this poem
Because ur very important to me, I want u to know that u are my friend and I love u but I hate the life I live or maybe its just the pretence that I continually live
Yeah there are times when I am happy like when you are and I see u smile
Tash, Owaynie, Shanique, Sheena, Deleen, Jo, Leo, John and my family esp. Dave
Its great to see u smile
Sometimes I wish my end was now but there are something’s I’d miss like seeing Nel, my sister’s baby graduate, and kissing my son Matthew
Its hard for me to ignore the pain of wanting so much more and I think the only time I’ll get it is when I’m walking with my redeemer
So I tell u now when I die don’t shed a tear for me
I am gonna smile because I know ur happy that I’m finally happy
Written: Tannika Tamar Montique