from the first thought that i remember, and until my dying day

the thoughts that ive thought, the paths that ive chosen

leave a haunting in my wake....

the things that ive done, the choices that have damned me

and every instant in between

are whats built the tapestry of my life.... no apologies

a man lives with love in his heart, he lives with his dreams

he goes about his life chasing them.... those dreams

dreams of a family, maybe even a life long love, and other impossibilities

but he dreams them none the less....

a woman to love, a child to bear witness.... to the love of a family

to grow with. it just seems such an impossible task...

but the grandparents did it

when love and commitment wasnt so much to ask... dammit.

ive been down that road, many times by now, but im always being sent back

ive given my all, been the best that i can

i think ill have to move on just being happy with that..... yeah?

i dont use, i dont abuse.... and i dont lie.

ive got some stuff wrong with the best of intentions, thats the lifething.... learn as i go

pay attention to the way the balls bouncing, and just follow the flow.....

ive done my time good, ive been the best that i can.... i have no regrets

except the ive been left a shell of a man....