PAINFUL THOUGHT
My heart is pure, yet not as pure as any other. My mind though is so unclear I can hardly think, for I am always wondering if I have a soul. A soul inside this forsaken body,I call pain. For that is all I ever feel, inside these are all the painful thoughts, of a life I wish was not mine. It is finally clear to me, that I now know this life, my life has been planned out. Why is it though it has been all pain, sadness, anger, hatred, and always feeling like no one cares? Though I have this angel, that keeps me here. Without this perfect lfe, I would probably be where I wanted to go for along time. All I want is to be happy in life, but I was never brought up to know what happiness felt like, until my angel came along and rescued me. Yet I find it hard, for I hurt this precious beautiful angel, because it accepts me. Like no one ever has before, it is hard to start from scratch when you were never taught. How or in my case ever felt it. Though I am always either crying, screaming, or yelling. Why I don't know, but all I know is I may be weak, but my angel has made me bloom into a butterfly. Who is teaching me how to fly.. But I am scared, because I push all this away, because my angel loves me. For who I am inside and out. This is very hard to accept. For this beautiful being knows all my darkest secrets, that i am so ashamed of. Though I will not let this perfect angel down, I will not let myself... How's that for a painful thought???
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