Dead Scared

3 Comments

Dead Scared

People live in fear of death, the fear of what's to come,
not knowing what tomorrow brings makes your mind go numb.
I don't know what will happen, but I can't fear my demise,
I know when my time has come, I'll stare death in the eyes.
I could live a long life, I could also die tomorrow,
I greet death with open arms, others greet death with sorrow.
I look forward to my time when life and death collide,
looking down on all of you as I pass to the other side.
Don't cry for me when I go, I have no purpose in this life,
everyday just prolongs the pain, like sleeping on a knife.
No one has a need for me, no one really cares,
I wonder what they think of me, behind thier gawking stares.
Others say they love me, I know they don't mean what they said,
I have a hole in my heart, not a hole in my head.
Please don't worry about me, for I have no fear,
just savor the moment when my end is near.
Enjoy my final seconds as I keep death at bay,
for that is when I'll be happiest, anyway.

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kym commented on Dead Scared

04-18-2009

wow that was a really intense poem. Extremely good if i may add. what brought that emotion on

twayneking commented on Dead Scared

03-06-2009

Suggestion - read the lyrics to the song "Mad World". Great example of showing pain with pictures.

twayneking commented on Dead Scared

03-06-2009

You made your emotions clear; perhaps too clear. I'll tell you like I used to tell my writing students. The word "pain" is the most overused word in bad poetry. Avoid it at all costs. Show us pain, don't tell us you're having it. Take us there, but don't tell us we're going there first. You're a poet, not a motivational speaker. Paint pictures with words. Let us draw our conclusions from the pictures. Telling us is too easy. Good luck with your work.

Poetry comes nearer to vital truth than history.

Plato (BC 427-BC 347) Greek philosopher.

TheLyricalOne’s Poems (17)

Title Comments
Title Comments
Dead Scared 3
My Kurse 1
Pain 0
Bombarded 2
Chaos 0
Dreamscan 1
Thou Shalt Not! 0
Jerry and the Devil 0
Time 0
Balance 0
My Last Stand 1
Agonizing Love 0
4 U! 0
My Love 0
My Angel, My Love 1
You Call Me Crazy 0
Hopeless Young Romantic 0